I knew a guy in Dundee years ago. A real hardman and a drug dealer. The Police knew him well and only went near him mob-handed and tooled-up. Anyway, one day he gets a knock at the door from the TV man.
"According to our records, you do not have a TV Licence" says the bold chap.
"Yes I do" says Roddy (for that was his name)
TV guy looks at his notes, "Well, we have no record of it. Can I see it please?"
"Certainly, just wait a minute"
Roddy disappeared into the house, (closing the door behind him. Drug dealers don't let strangers just wander in).
A couple of minutes later, the door opens and Roddy returns.
"Here's ma TV licence here. D'ye want a closer look?"
The TV man turned pale, turned tail and ran.
You see, not many people have a sawn-off, double-barrelled TV licence.
I think other countries would piss themselves laughing if they knew we had a tv tax in 2009. You're having a laugh they would say. Well it's no laugh and hundreds of otherwise unemployable people are paid over a £100K at the BBC to do fuck all. It's perfect NU Lab though. 1. bottomless pit of money 2. Unaccountable 3. supports Green issues, Multiculturalism, Islam, gay rights, feminism, Unionism etc 4. If you don't pay the £148 then we will put you in a prison.
I won't bore/irritate you with the half dozen reasons why I haven't had a TV in 30 years. I do get all the reminders though. At first I decided to keep them and one day send them to Ester Rantzen so she could take the piss on "That's Life". That bit the dust, but I carried on putting them all in the same old shoe box anyway. I've recently passed the 300 landmark. About 18 months ago came a knock on the door. I clocked him via my early warning system (net curtains). 5foot4, 16 stone, shaven head, shirt/tie. Looked like a bouncer. I thought not today thanks and kept quiet. Imagine my glee when I read in the letter he left: "We told you we would come round". It only took 30 years. 300 letters and one visit, - how many licence fees has that cost? I have great empathy with Roddy, mentioned above, but prefer to do things in a more piss-taking kinda way. I'll run up the bill as long as I can. If they ever do catch me (unlikely), I will just invite them in, polite as you like, offer tea & biscuits, ask if they are happy in their work etc...
By the way, if they ever do catch me, it wouldn't mean the reminders would stop. They're that fucking stupid.
9 comments:
Cheers for the link Rab :-)
Enjoy your 80' ;-)
I knew a guy in Dundee years ago. A real hardman and a drug dealer. The Police knew him well and only went near him mob-handed and tooled-up. Anyway, one day he gets a knock at the door from the TV man.
"According to our records, you do not have a TV Licence" says the bold chap.
"Yes I do" says Roddy (for that was his name)
TV guy looks at his notes, "Well, we have no record of it. Can I see it please?"
"Certainly, just wait a minute"
Roddy disappeared into the house, (closing the door behind him. Drug dealers don't let strangers just wander in).
A couple of minutes later, the door opens and Roddy returns.
"Here's ma TV licence here. D'ye want a closer look?"
The TV man turned pale, turned tail and ran.
You see, not many people have a sawn-off, double-barrelled TV licence.
Why oh why do we continue to let the BBC act like a mafia? Scrap the license and make the BBC pay-per-view.
And they can take the governments propaganda with them when they slide into the bottomless hole that follows.
I think other countries would piss themselves laughing if they knew we had a tv tax in 2009. You're having a laugh they would say.
Well it's no laugh and hundreds of otherwise unemployable people are paid over a £100K at the BBC to do fuck all.
It's perfect NU Lab though.
1. bottomless pit of money
2. Unaccountable
3. supports Green issues, Multiculturalism, Islam, gay rights, feminism, Unionism etc
4. If you don't pay the £148 then we will put you in a prison.
I'm with VotR on this, Rab, as you know - they should be made to sink or swim with subscriptions only.
Haven't payed mine in 3 years.........I have 5 T.V.s in the house....come on ya bastards.
I won't bore/irritate you with the half dozen reasons why I haven't had a TV in 30 years. I do get all the reminders though. At first I decided to keep them and one day send them to Ester Rantzen so she could take the piss on "That's Life". That bit the dust, but I carried on putting them all in the same old shoe box anyway. I've recently passed the 300 landmark.
About 18 months ago came a knock on the door. I clocked him via my early warning system (net curtains). 5foot4, 16 stone, shaven head, shirt/tie. Looked like a bouncer. I thought not today thanks and kept quiet.
Imagine my glee when I read in the letter he left: "We told you we would come round". It only took 30 years.
300 letters and one visit, - how many licence fees has that cost?
I have great empathy with Roddy, mentioned above, but prefer to do things in a more piss-taking kinda way. I'll run up the bill as long as I can.
If they ever do catch me (unlikely), I will just invite them in, polite as you like, offer tea & biscuits, ask if they are happy in their work etc...
By the way, if they ever do catch me, it wouldn't mean the reminders would stop. They're that fucking stupid.
Would you folks mind paying for a truly independent media that was free of political and corporate influence?
think we need to be lookin into this too n get it cancelled, BBC should be scrappin it anyway, all they show is shit i don't watch
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