Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Cat woman in even more trouble

The most hated woman in Britain, (funny old country, to be honest), is in even more bother this morning.

Mary Bates faces being 'investigated' by fake charity the RSPCA and has received hundreds of threats after footage of her dumping the cat in a wheelie bin flashed all over the world. However, she can sleep easy as West Midlands police have deployed two PCSO's on her doorstep. Providing any violence she receives is within permitted health and safety PCSO guidelines she is in safe hands.

However, in a last minute addition to her woes, a Coventry City Council spokesman announced this morning that as Mrs Bates had clearly breached the council's recycling policy she will now be prosecuted by the council.

The spokesman explained,

"As the accused is seen clearly using the wrong colour of wheelie bin for disposal of the cat we have no option but to send round a hi-viz wearing, nosey, jobsworth, overpaid, jumped up, tosser to ensure she is punished to the full extent of the law."

He went on,

"I hope this serves as a lesson to others that waste such as cats should be put in the brown bin."


Amusing Bunni said...

If she put in the blue bin, instead of the green one, she'd be in less trouble, no doubt.

Dick Puddlecote said...

Hehehe. Nice one, Rab. :)

Welshblogger said...

Love it!!

The funny thing is, that in this day and age we would expect that to happen.

The Grim Reaper said...

The terrifying thing is that, even though I know it's satire, it wouldn't surprise me if it later turns out to be true.

Perhaps this is a prophecy?

Anonymous said...

The upsurge in animal cruelty stories is more than likely a clandestine campaign by quangoes working under government control to manufacture a state of frenzy among enough people to reach the tipping point from which they can launch a campaign to increase their power over the people as a matter of "necessity". One manufacturers a state of "emergency" by introducing stories of a few harsh animal cruelty stories into the "news" and then the "solution" will be, more control is "needed" - thus tightening the noose a little more. Do that agency by agency, quango by quango and pretty soon, you have a police state, one that everyone has already agreed to during their fit of anger and despair, which was as the perpetrators of every propaganda campaign have conspired to manufacture in the first place. There is probably some boring, dull, smoke-less back-room somewhere that elites in control meet to plot out each month's plan of attack upon the populace, which is duped.

Anonymous said...

Along that same line of reasoning, in the US last week, 28 people got sick from egg poisoning, salmonella, 28 out of 300,000,000+ US population total - and after the "emergency" was propagandized loudly enough, the "solution" came in the "news" this week when nameless, faceless officials at the FDA made their announcement that because of the egg poisoning, this "proves" that FDA powers of control and authority "must" be expanded. Soon, Obama will sign an executive order, circumventing democratic procedure and vest more power and control to the nameless bureaucrats at the FDA, who will then use that power to instead go after "the smokers" and others the FDA wishes to harass into submission. It's a Beast and it works at all levels at once, creeping fascism in plain view, yet always explainable, to the populace, as a "need". But they always need to get people riled up first, so that the people themselves will be calling for increased controls, as a "solution". I'd be wary of any increased campaign in today's "news"papers that within one week result in a call for more control and power among some government department or fake-charity quango for our "good". It's the creation of the hatred and outrage, in peoples' blood, is how they justify their power grabs as the angry oppressed become blind to what is happening to them, because of the anger, the "ten minute hate" as Orwell explained it.

microdave said...

"I hope this serves as a lesson to others that waste such as cats (Or Ed Balls) should be put in the brown bin."