I hate my neighbours.

Yes, I hate my neighbours. Not all of them, most I just look at with a sneer. The neighbours to one side of me are fine, not a peep from them. I admit that I do not know their names, but that's modern life I suppose.

Now, the neighbours to the other side of us are a different matter. They haven't really done anything to piss me off, it's all a combination of small things. Plus they seem to have a better standard of living than us without the inconvenience of having to work.

When we moved into our house at the beginning of last year we did so with some trepidation. We needed a house quickly as we were living in a private let. Very nice and quiet it was too, but too expensive. We applied for a council house and got offered one fairly quickly. When the offer came through we jumped into the car armed with a street map of the town, (we are not 'locals'), and searched for the street. First impressions were not good. The street was and still is a dump. Inhabited by the zombiefied living dead flotsam of the benefit system.

The house itself is good, a spacious layout, plenty of cupboards, large rooms and decent sized garden with off road parking. It's great, (although desperately needing some decent decorating which I would normally have done by now, but we have reasons for not doing so, perhaps one day I will blog on the reasons why), but the area is not. If the town we live in can be compared to a human being, our street would be the arsehole.

Nobody bothers us directly, because we do not bother anyone else. And that's the way we like it.

Back to the subject of my ejaculation. The neighbours 'through the wall'.

Both households have the same amount of people living in it. My household is a 'working' household. They are not. They have a bigger TV than us and a sky dish. They enjoy getting pissed several times a week, I rarely drink. They manage to overfill two wheeliebins, we barely fill our sole wheelie bin. We own a Ford Escort, they own a souped up Vauxhall Vectra with a big noisy fuck off exhaust system. The local kebab shop delivery service is a frequent visitor to their door.

In their back garden, which is separated from ours by a four foot high wire fence, sits two old cars. Both are 'works in progress' although the lazy bastard is never near them. Two large German Shepard dogs inhabit the garden for most of the day and late into the night, barking at everything, and I mean EVERYTHING. They are never exercised and one is aggressive, particularly towards children. During hot sunny days normally the scent of barbeque's is what you would expect. Not us, our nostrils are assaulted with the smell of sun baked dog shit.

They bark all day long and late into the night. No effort is made to stop them by their 'owners'. I have came to the conclusion that they are deaf. They must be! It's the dogs that really get on my tits. I'm not a cruel person, but I would easily beat them to death with a baseball bat, swiftly followed by the neanderthal owner. I know it's not the dog's fault, but the constant barking grates on your nerves. It's affecting the quality of our lives. My wife's eight year old brother cannot play in our back garden, the dogs go bananas. The neighbours do nothing.

We don't really speak to the neighbours. When we moved in I tried to strike up a conversation, but all I got back was a grunt and a mongified expression. At least I tried. I doubt any conversation about their dogs will have the desired outcome.

We hope to move as soon as we can. We are expecting the patter of tiny feet and I do not want to bring up kids in this environment.

You know what the really sad thing is? I am not unique. The same is repeated countless times in every town and city. The country is inhabited by selfish, self absorbed people who have no idea of the impact they are having on others. Bastards.